Ouch

Last night I was washing some dishes. There was a wine glass. I grabbed it, slathered it with the soapy rag and shoved it under the stream of water. I moved the rag to the inner portion of the glass, it shattered. I felt the sharp pain of the edge dig deep into my skin. I instantly reacted, saying "I just cut myself..." as I turned the water to cold and forced my hand into the cold water. I rinsed my fingers, and pulled my hand out of the stream. Blood gushed to the surface covering my fingers in red. No in a slight panicked voice I asked "Can you get me a rag or paper towel or something? and ice?.. Om my god this hurts."

Trying to stay calm I continued to run the freezing cold water over the wound, knowing that this will shrink the blood vessels and slow the bleeding. In the meantime Tequila grabbed the ice, pulled out a few cubes, wrapped them in paper towel and handed them to me. I pressed the makeshift cold pack to my cut. The cold from the ice hurt more than the wound. I kept the pressure on for a few a quick minute. We decided to take another look, as soon as the cold pack was removed the blood rushed back.

"We need to take you to the hospital" Tequila ordered.

I shot back quickly, knowing that would mean needles, and stitches "No, no... This will be fine.."

I quickly changed my mind though and we were off.

Three hours, two shots, and four stitches later we were on our way home.

I now have the next 5 days off. I can't work. I can't really do much with my right hand.


I called my mom this morning. I asked her "How many stitches did The Little Bro get?"

Concert Mom said "6, why?"

I then told her the whole story, even the part about almost passing out while I was getting stitched up.


I won't post the pic, it's pretty gross. Unless you want to see it.

Current Situation

Creed is rocking on the radio.

It's too cold without the heat on, but too warm with it on also.

Someone at the Cubs must have read my post because Mark Prior is starting the year at Iowa.

The $2000 hotel bill I was looking at will now be picked up by The Company.

I still have to go to Las Vegas in two weeks.

I need a new couch. And a new TV.

The new guy is starting soon. I had no idea until HR called today. I think I feel myself coming down with something that day. [cough, cough]

My little bro had his minor surgery yesterday. He's at home doing fine today.

Baseball season starts in 4 days.

Cable Shows

So I started watching 'Weeds' yesterday. I am through the first two episodes and although it is no 'Rome' or 'Soprano's' it is quite entertaining and I can't wait to see more.

There is just something about the shows that HBO produces. Six Feet under, Band Of Brothers, Deadwood, and even Sex in The City were (are) great. Well, the first few seasons of them (except for B.O.B. which was a miniseries) were anyway. That being said, no other show has been as much of a 'must see' for me as the Soprano's has been. Last year, I "found" the episodes on the internet, and played them on my ipod. This year I have cable, and a DVR. I can't decide if I should pay for HBO to get the last season or just download and play via the ipod again.

Sports figures in Chicago

Dear Chicago Cubs,

Please send mark Prior to Iowa to start the season. To pay this guy 3.whatever million for this season and have him start it off on the DL is ridiculous. His best chance of becoming someone that can help your team is to have him play baseball, not have an extended spring training. If he isn't on the Big League team he should be on the Iowa minor league team where he will face the best competition. Maybe he can join the MLB team by mid May, maybe not and he should be traded. But you won't know that unless he actually plays baseball.


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Dear Chicago Bears,

Lance Briggs has stated more than once that he wants to 'Be THE Man' and get out of Urlacher's shadow. He isn't happy with the Franchise Tag and the 7.whatever million he will get for playing on your team next season. I say trade him. trade him to the San Francisco 49ers, or the Texans or some other 'Bad' team that doesn't really have a chance of making the playoffs let alone having a winning season. He can then 'Be THE man' on some shitty team. Sure his individual stats will be through the roof, but his team will suck. All of his stats will be useless when he isn't playing in the post season.. you know...the time when it matters most to these players.


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Home Sweet Home

Last night was the best night of alone sleep I have had in a looong time. The new place is starting to feel like 'Home' finally.

I still need to add some items to my new home, but it is really shaping up.

Flat. Pump. Cop.

So last night I walked out of my office at 7:15PM. My car was the only car in the lot. My car had a flat tire. I was out at lunch driving around and didn't notice anything like a flat tire. So between 1:30 and 7:15 my tire went flat. I spent the next little while changing it. As I swapped my tire out for the mini spare I noticed a nail in the tread and thought to myself ''Ah-ha!''

Having super dirty hands and knowing I can't get back into my office building without triggering all sorts of alarms I decided to drive down the street to the nearest gas station where I could fill up, wash my hands and get something to drink for the ride home. I pulled in and did my normal 'Pay at the pump' routine and headed in to the washroom to freshen up. I grabbed an iced tea and paid for it, making small talk with the attendant. I am in this particular gas station all the time so pretty much everyone inside recognizes me. He hands me my change and I head out the door. As I stroll through the parking lot I notice a cop talking to a few people over to my right. I jump in my car, start the engine and slowly pull away. All the sudden I hear some crunching noise and the people talking to the cop (who are now to my left) are pointing at me and yelling. I think to myself, 'What the hell was that?" as the before mentioned cop is running tword me, one hand on his gun, yelling "SHUT OFF THE ENGINE AND EXIT THE VEHICLE. NOW!!!"

I did as he said seeing as I really wasn't into being shot by some rookie suburban cop. AS I got out of my car I noticed the nozzle of the gas pump hanging out of my gas tank just as the Rook Cop was drilling me about weather or not I paid for the gas. I replied, "Calm down, look the pump is asking me if I want a receipt... it wouldn't do that if I didn't pay. Would it?"

"Come with me inside, and give me your drivers license" he orders.

I muttered "Well, I can add to the short list of things I have never done before" as I shuffled through the lot noticing everyone else at the station starring at me.

The guys inside are all laughing at me as I enter their store. The Rook demands of them "Was pump 11 paid for?"

"Yes, hahaha, buddie.. pump.. hehehe 11 is taken care of"

" I just want to reaffirm, pump 11 is paid for?"

"pbbbbttt Yes, it is. Hahahahahahaa. Please bring the nozzle inside, we have a company that'll come take care of this. hahahahahaheheheheahaha."

"Here is your license, you're free to go" he states as he extends his arm holding my ID.

I snatch it up and reply "Gee thanks........" and turn with "Barney" muttered under my breath.

The best part is that my tire isn't flat due to the nail, but from the sidewall getting blown out from one of the gazillion potholes I encountered over the weekend.

Anyone know where to get a decent set of tires for cheap? Or how to claim pot hole damage to the city? that would be even better.

So far today I have.....

... been blamed for losing a piece sales demo equipment I never had.
....been told by a customer that I am purposefully lagging on his repair. (The same guy gave the office secretary a hard time because she left early on Friday to attend to her live in boyfriend who was in the emergency room after a bad car accident, and he seems to think I am going to jump his work to the front of the line and get it back to him by Wednesday)
.... had a craptastic 25 minute lunch break. bite bite swallow, no time for chewing...
... have been asked 20 times "Are they going to fill the open position here?" like I have any say in that, or even know who 'they' are.

I love Monday's!

Gone, Gone, Gone

He no longer works here, but his legacy lives on.

Poor quality work was his, but I am the one here that gets the blame and has to cover his tracks.

Happy Friday everyone!

Easy Money

Do you have a Car or a Van? Start Making Money

---

Reply to: sale-294492233@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-03-15, 12:47PM CDT

Do you have a Car or a Van?

You can start making money, how? (Good Question)
We will give you a magnet sign 12” X 24” that say’s Stop this Car and Get 10% OFF Furniture.

Ok but how will I make Money? (Another good Questions)
Its simple the coupon we will give you has a code that will let us know who sent the customer. (Example your account number is CU101, that means the coupon saving code will also be CU101)

Ok, but how much will I make? (The best Question)
You will make 5% off the Sale that the customer purchases. (Example a customer stopped you and asked you for a coupon, and the customer did come in and ended up buying anything that we carry. Let’s say he bought a Sectional for $990 ~you will not get 5% of the TAX OR DELIVERY CHARGES COLLECTED ~ but you will get 5% of the Sectional price, so you made on this one sale $49.50)

When do I get my Commission?
We will mail all of the checks on the 5^th of each month; it will have the Customers Last name only with the invoice Number and the total they have bought.

How much do I have to spend on these magnets? (The answer is Simple)
You will pay nothing for them.

If you are interested please email me the Following.
Year of the car:
Make:
Model:
Color:
And your information.
Name:
Phone Number:

I will get back to you as soon as I can.

Email me at magnetprogram@homedream42.com and start making money.

• This item has been posted by-dealer.
• Location: Furniture Magnet Program
• it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

Tip Toe

After living below people who marched like elephants around their place I find myself tip toeing around in my new apartment. I pause suddenly when the floor creaks, I try to walk lightly, I keep the volume on the TV low. I find myself very conscience of the fact that someone, who I have yet to meet, lives right below me.

Hummmm.....

So the office secretary just returned to the office after week in Florida.

She brought me some souvenirs:



#1 - a Geico 'So Easy A Cave Man Can Do It' Can Coolie












and




#2 - A Trojan












Um, thanks I guess.

Someday I hope to have a dog like this one.

Blahhh

So not only is the Dan Ryan fucked again, but the South Side Irish Parade is this Sunday.

Heading to the far South Suburbs to visit the family is going to suck.

UPDATE!!

Finally you saying.

Well, I moved. It was pretty painless, minus the part where it feels like someone smashed the heel of my left foot with a sledge hammer. Seriously, it hurts to walk.

I guess that's what happens when you are on your feet for the better part of six days.

Other than that I haven't been up to much.

Does anyone know the line-up for this years Lollapalooza? I just bought 2 tickets for $60 each and have no idea when it is or who is playing.

Krispy Kreme

So Good You'll Suck a Dick


See the TV broadcast here.


Tonight my buddy Scott Metzger is coming back to town to play his guitar tonight. The show is sold out.

The last time I saw him play, in his band RANA, we ended up at Kingston Mines till 4 or 5AM. Ryan, the drummer, ended up on my couch. The next morning I drove him to Matt's brothers place down by the lake. A couple of us went up on the roof and puffed some weed. I helped them load some stuff into their van and was asked to accompany them to Indy for their next show. I had a date (our 2nd) with Tequila to go see The Hold Steady.

Needless to say, I didn't go to Indy.

Test

Dear Readers,

Take this test and post your score in the comments.

Rules Of The Road

http://www.gmacinsurance.com/SafeDriving/2006/test.asp

Here is my score:

National Drivers Test - Results

Your score was: 100%

A score of 70% or better is considered passing on a state written drivers test. The correct answers are highlighted below.